Have you ever received life changing news when your plate seemed so full already?
Our family received such news during the winter of 2015 when one of our twins (Lucas) was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.
Our family was living a pretty full life at the time. We had two full-time jobs, 3 young children ages 10 and 6 (twins), church, school and extra curricular activities, and my husband’s job required him to travel during the winter months.
Whew! Full life. It’s a life you may know well.
There were warning signs in the symptoms our son Lucas was experiencing.
Despite those warnings, I still felt like my world came crashing down around me when we were told our son has Type 1 Diabetes. Ever felt that way? Like you are already spinning 6 plates at the same time and you have no idea what you will do if one of them wobbles and falls off? Well, that’s exactly where I was in that hospital room and the days following this new diagnosis.
At this point I had two choices: I could choose anger, bitterness and trying to make it through on my own, or I could turn to God for help. I couldn’t change this situation but I could decide how I was going to move forward.
I was frustrated and overwhelmed, and although I’d love to say I turned to God in prayer and found comfort in his word right away that isn’t what happened. I spent a good amount of time angry that this happened to our child and trying to make everything work on my own. It was exhausting! I could feel myself becoming more bitter and miserable. It wasn’t until then that I finally realized I needed help. Real help. I cried out to God.
For many years I was afraid to be honest with God about what I was really feeling. I felt guilty about how I was handling things and thought God would be disappointed that I was angry.
Can I tell you something? You do not have to be afraid to be honest with God! You can be real with him. In our struggling we are not condemned or cast aside when we turn to God.
Psalm 34:18 tells us that “the Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” I was definitely crushed in spirit.
Psalm 145:18 reminds us, “the Lord is close to all who call on him.”
He also promises us that we do not have to do it alone. Joshua 1:9 says “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” ESV
God was there with me on that snowy Valentine’s Day when we received the diagnosis, and he comforted me as I wrestled through my emotions. He listened to my prayers and gave me the strength to take the steps needed to make changes.
The coolest thing happened when I began to take my real concerns to God. I noticed that those feelings of anger and bitterness started to diminish, while at the same time positive changes were happening in my job & family. I had this strange sense of peace that no matter what happened God was going to take care of Lucas and our family. I can’t tell you any of this was easy or that the changes happened overnight. I had to do my part and keep trusting God as I took each step. He is there for you too.
Here we are 5 years later, and I still have a full-time job, but now I am working from home. We still have three sons, one who lives daily with Type 1 Diabetes and a hectic family schedule, but I have a peace inside as we move through our days. I know that when I bring my everything to God, He is right here and he will never leave me alone.
- Type 1 diabetes (T1D) is an autoimmune disease in which insulin-producing beta cells in the pancreas are mistakenly destroyed by the body’s immune system. T1D seems to have a genetic component and can be diagnosed early in life but also in adulthood. Its causes are not fully known, and there is currently no cure. People with T1D are dependent on injected or pumped insulin to survive.
- For more information about type 1 Diabetes please visit https://www.jdrf.org
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I know life can be crazy sometimes, and it is my prayer that you find comfort, encouragement and hope here.
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